4 Jokes For Man With No Arms

Standup-Comedy Bits

Updated on: Aug 03 2024

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So, I stumbled upon a street performer who's a juggler with no arms. I thought, "This has to be a joke." But no, he's tossing those balls in the air with his feet, and I'm standing there, mesmerized. It's like a magic trick – where are the hands? I felt like giving him a standing ovation just for finding a way to juggle without hands. Bravo, my man!
I was watching TV, and there's this cooking show with a chef who has no arms. I thought, "Okay, this I gotta see." He's trying to chop vegetables with his feet and stir a pot with his mouth. It's like culinary acrobatics! I can barely cook with two hands, and here's this guy, turning the kitchen into his personal Cirque du Soleil.
You know, I recently met this guy who claims to be a handyman, but get this – he has no arms! Now, I'm thinking, "How's he gonna fix anything?" I asked him, "How do you even hold a hammer?" And he goes, "Well, it's all about the headbutt technique!" Can you imagine calling him for a plumbing emergency? "Yeah, my sink's leaking!" And he's there like, "Don't worry, I've got this... with my face!
I saw this man with no arms trying to give someone a high-five. It was the most awkward thing ever. He's like, "Up top!" and the other person's just standing there, confused. But you know what's worse? When someone tries to fist-bump him, and he's like, "Nope, sorry, I can't. I'm not equipped for that. Let's stick to elbow bumps, folks!

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