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What did the beef say to the bartender? 'I'll have a 'bloody mary', hold the 'booze'!
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What do you call a cow during an earthquake? A 'moo-ver' and a 'shaker'!
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What did the lean beef say to the lazy vegetables? 'Come on, lettuce beef up!
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I tried going on a lean beef diet, but it turns out I misheard – I thought they said 'clean beef.' No wonder I was scrubbing my T-bone with a toothbrush!
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I asked the butcher for lean beef, and he handed me a photo of a cow on a treadmill. I said, 'No, I meant the meat, not the workout plan!'
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They say lean beef is healthier. Well, I want my beef to be so lean that when I order a burger, it shows up at the gym instead of my doorstep, asking for a personal trainer!
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I told my doctor I'm on a lean beef diet. He said, 'That's great!' Then I clarified, 'Yeah, it's a diet where I lean towards the beef section in every grocery store!'
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I told my friend I'm into lean beef now, and he said, 'Oh, trying to be healthy?' I said, 'No, it's just that my fridge complained about the excess baggage!'
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Lean beef is so fitness-conscious; it's like the Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson of the meat department. I half-expect my steak to start giving motivational speeches before I eat it!
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I ordered a lean beef sandwich, and it was so lean that it whispered diet tips to me as I ate. 'Hey, buddy, do you really need that extra mayo?'
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Lean Beef, or as I like to call it, the gym enthusiast of the meat world. It's like, 'I don't want fat, I want my steak to do burpees before it gets to my plate!'
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They say lean beef is the secret to a healthy heart. I'm just waiting for a cardiologist to recommend a steak instead of a statin – 'Take two T-bones and call me in the morning!'
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