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Joke Types
The Forgetful Neighbor
Dealing with people who have no idea who you are or why you're knocking
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I knocked on my neighbor's door, and they looked at me like I was the missing link. "What do you want?" they asked. I said, "Just trying to be neighborly." They responded, "Neighborly? I thought you were the census taker. Do you have a census taker discount on that vacuum?
The Paranoid Homeowner
Suspicion that every knock is a potential threat
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I knocked on a door, and the homeowner opened it, staring at me with the intensity of someone who just caught their teenager sneaking in late at night. "What do you want?" he asked. I said, "I heard you might be interested in a time machine. It's great for going back to when you were more trusting.
The Door-to-Door Salesman
Trying to sell to people who are just not interested
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I knocked on a door, and a guy answered wearing a T-shirt that said, "I have everything I need." I said, "How about a state-of-the-art vacuum cleaner?" He replied, "Sorry, I've already got a cat. It sheds enough to qualify as a fur-powered vacuum.
The Prankster Teenager
Juggling the desire to have fun with the risk of annoying or alarming people
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The other day, I knocked on a door, and the person opened it, and before I could say anything, they shouted, "Pizza delivery!" I said, "Well, I've got a different kind of delivery—a punchline. It's much lighter than a pizza.
The Sleeping Baby's Parent
Balancing the need to keep the baby asleep and dealing with unexpected visitors
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Imagine knocking on a door, and the parent opens it holding a baby monitor in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other. I said, "Need a vacuum that can multitask? It sucks up dirt and lullabies at the same time.
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