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Why did King Arthur start a gardening club? He wanted to 'cultivate' his kingdom!
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Why was King Arthur always calm during battles? He had 'knight-tranquility'!
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Why did King Arthur only eat natural foods? Because he didn't like things that were 'Excalibur-ated'!
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Why did King Arthur bring a dragon to the round table? For a 'roaring' good time!
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Why was King Arthur a great detective? Because he always knew how to 'uncover' the truth!
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Why did King Arthur bring a ladder to battle? He wanted to 'raise the bar'!
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Why did King Arthur bring his pet falcon to the feast? He wanted it to experience 'knightly dining'!
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Why did King Arthur's horse join a band? Because it had the 'neigh-sical' talent!
King Arthur had his own version of 'Who Wants to Be a Millionaire' – except the final question was: 'Who can pull a sword out of a stone?' That's like the medieval version of 'Survivor'.
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You know, King Arthur's Britain must have been wild. They had their own version of 'Who Wants to Be a Millionaire' except instead of answering questions, you just had to pull a sword out of a stone. I can see it now, Welcome back to 'Medieval Millionaire'! Today's final round: 'Who Can Remove the Sword?' It's like 'Survivor,' but instead of getting voted off the island, you're trying to get voted in as king!
King Arthur's search for the Holy Grail – the ultimate medieval treasure hunt, sponsored by Monty Python.
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King Arthur went on this quest for the Holy Grail, right? That must've been the ultimate medieval treasure hunt, sponsored by Monty Python. I can almost hear them, Alright lads, we're off to find a cup that might make us immortal! But be careful, it might also bring out the silly walks and killer rabbits!
King Arthur, the only guy in history who got famous for a magic rock and a fancy sword. If that happened today, he'd have a reality show called 'Rock 'n Sword'.
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Can we talk about King Arthur for a sec? This guy got famous for a rock and a sword. A rock! I mean, nowadays, someone finds a funky-shaped stone in their backyard, they think it's a fossil or a meteorite. If King Arthur were here today, forget Camelot, he'd have a reality show called 'Rock 'n Sword.' Watch as I try to pull a sword out of this rock for the umpteenth time, only on Medieval TV!
King Arthur's round table – where knights gathered for meetings or medieval speed dating, depending on who you ask.
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Have you heard about King Arthur's round table? Yeah, apparently it was where all his knights gathered for meetings. But let's be real, it was probably the original medieval speed dating spot. Picture it: Hey, Sir Lancelot, you come here often? Yeah, I hear you've got a thing for damsels in distress. Mind if I joust for your attention?
King Arthur, the original medieval influencer, trying to make Camelot the 'it' place without Wi-Fi or indoor plumbing.
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Let's give it up for King Arthur, the original medieval influencer. He was trying to make Camelot the 'it' place, but let's be real, they didn't have Wi-Fi or indoor plumbing. I bet he was there, posing with Excalibur, trying to hashtag #CastleGoals while secretly wishing for a moat with a decent Wi-Fi signal.
King Arthur's sword, Excalibur – the original 'my weapon is bigger than yours' power move.
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Excalibur, King Arthur's sword – that was the original 'my weapon is bigger than yours' power move. Can't you just imagine Arthur strolling into a medieval pub, sword in hand, saying, Oh, this? It's just my Excalibur. No big deal. Yeah, it's only the most famous sword in history. No, you can't touch it, it's for kings only.
King Arthur's court was like the medieval Avengers, just with more chainmail and fewer explosions.
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King Arthur's court, it was like the medieval version of the Avengers. Arthur was definitely Captain Britain, Merlin was the wise Doctor Strange, and Lancelot, oh yeah, he was the Iron Man of the bunch. But you know what? Instead of high-tech suits and cool gadgets, they rocked chainmail and horses. Less explosions, more clanking sounds!
King Arthur – the original boss who hired knights in shining armor and didn't have to worry about HR complaints for workplace dress code.
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You know what's impressive about King Arthur? He was a boss who hired knights in shining armor and never had to worry about HR complaints for workplace dress code violations. Can you imagine? Sir Lancelot, I need you to rescue the damsel in distress, but please, no helmet hair. We have a kingdom to save, but fashion first!
King Arthur, the original influencer, trying to pull off chainmail in the era of #ArmorGoals.
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You know, I was reading about King Arthur recently. I mean, seriously, the guy had a sword stuck in a stone, claiming it was a sign of royalty. If that happened today, we'd have influencers lined up at Home Depot, trying to yank selfie sticks out of cement, hashtagging #RoyaltyGoals. Can you imagine the Instagram posts? Just snagged Excalibur, feeling regal AF! #SwordInTheStoneSelfie #MedievalChic
King Arthur and his knights must have been the OG boy band - gallivanting across the countryside, causing drama, and always in matching armor.
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Did you ever notice how King Arthur and his knights were basically the original boy band? They had their own crew, matching outfits - I mean, c'mon, those knights were like the medieval Backstreet Boys. Arthur was probably the brooding heartthrob, Lancelot the rebel, and Merlin? Oh, he's definitely the wise, older manager trying to keep them from falling apart backstage. I can almost hear them now, ♫ Everybody, yeah! Throw your swords in the air! ♫
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