bestTrending Topics
Joke Types
0
0
Job applications are like dating profiles for employment. You're there trying to impress, highlighting your best qualities, and conveniently leaving out the fact that your punctuality is questionable and your coffee addiction is borderline concerning.
0
0
You ever notice how filling out a job application feels like you're applying for a position as a professional form filler? "Well, I have a master's degree in filling out forms, and I specialize in checking the 'I Agree' box with unparalleled enthusiasm.
0
0
You ever notice how job applications have that section where they ask if you're a team player? Like, sure, I love teamwork, especially when it's me telling my cat that we're in this job application together.
0
0
Job applications are like the gateway to adulthood. You start by filling out your basic information and end up questioning your life choices, wondering if 5 years of professional hide-and-seek counts as a marketable skill.
0
0
Job applications ask for your strengths and weaknesses. I always consider putting "impatience" as a weakness but then worry they'll take too long to respond and prove me right.
0
0
I filled out a job application today and had to list my computer skills. I was tempted to write, "Can open 20 tabs simultaneously without crashing, and I'm a ninja at finding the mute button during Zoom calls.
0
0
Job applications make you sell yourself like you're the latest and greatest product. "Introducing the all-new model of me, now with 20% more efficiency and a built-in coffee maker for those late-night deadlines!
0
0
Job applications often ask about your long-term goals. Is it okay to write, "Not having to fill out job applications anymore"? Because that's a goal I can get behind.
0
0
Job applications ask for references, as if my friend Dave, who once saw me finish a whole pizza by myself, is a reliable indicator of my work ethic. "Yeah, he's a hard worker, especially when it comes to conquering food challenges.
Post a Comment