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I was watching a crime documentary the other day, and they mentioned Jeffrey Dahmer. You know you're a unique individual when even other criminals look at you and go, "Dude, too far.
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I read that Jeffrey Dahmer used to work in a chocolate factory. Talk about a missed marketing opportunity - "Dahmer's Deadly Delights: Chocolates to die for!
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Dahmer's fridge must have been like a horror movie version of MTV's "Cribs." "And here's where I keep my pickled kidneys, right next to the ketchup.
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I heard Dahmer was a loner. No wonder - it's hard to make friends when your idea of a dinner party involves dismemberment.
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You know, Dahmer had a thing for preserving body parts. I can barely keep my leftovers in the fridge for a week without turning into a mad scientist. "Ah, yes, tonight's dinner experiment.
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You ever think Dahmer missed his calling as a food critic? "This liver is a bit overcooked, and the seasoning on the spleen could use some work.
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You ever notice how Jeffrey Dahmer would've made a terrible chef? I mean, I can picture him presenting his dish, going, "It's to die for! Literally.
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Imagine Dahmer on a cooking show. "Today, we're making a classic stew. First, you marinate the meat, then you... oh, forget it, let's just order pizza.
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Dahmer was known for being a bit of a loner. Maybe he just misunderstood the term "cannibal networking.
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