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The Fashion Rebel
Fighting against mainstream fashion trends
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I went to a hipster eyeglass store, and I asked for glasses that don't actually improve my vision. The guy behind the counter said, "You mean clear lenses?" I said, "No, I mean lenses that make everything look like a Wes Anderson film.
The Coffee Connoisseur
Struggling with the mainstream coffee culture
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I tried ordering a regular black coffee, and the barista looked at me like I just asked for a cup of dirt. He said, "We only serve ethically sourced, fair-trade, organically grown, free-range coffee here." I said, "I just want a caffeine hit, not a resume.
The Vinyl Enthusiast
Dealing with the inconvenience of vinyl records
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I tried explaining to my niece what a record player is, and she looked at me like I was describing time travel. She said, "So, it's like a giant, round iPod that can only play one song at a time?" I said, "Yeah, but with more exercise involved.
The Food Truck Fanatic
Struggling with the abundance of avocado in hipster food
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I went to a brunch place that claimed to have the best avocado toast in town. I took a bite and thought, "Is this toast or did I accidentally order a garden sandwich?
The Tech Minimalist
Navigating a world obsessed with the latest gadgets
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My friend tried convincing me to get a smart fridge. I said, "I don't need my fridge to send me a notification when the milk is about to expire. I can handle the emotional trauma of smelling it myself, thank you.
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