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I admire Cindy Crawford for maintaining her beauty over the years. Meanwhile, I feel accomplished if I manage to put on matching socks in the morning. It's like my tiny victory against the chaos of adulthood.
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Cindy Crawford is timeless. I saw a picture of her from the '90s, and she looked exactly the same as she does now. Meanwhile, I found an old picture of myself, and I looked like I was auditioning for a role in a 'bad fashion choices' documentary.
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I saw Cindy Crawford in a commercial recently, and she's promoting skincare products. I bought them, thinking I could have a slice of her timeless beauty. Turns out, the only thing that got a makeover was my bank account.
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Cindy Crawford is the reason I have trust issues with anti-aging creams. I buy them, hoping to wake up looking like her, but I end up looking like a failed science experiment gone wrong – a mix between a scarecrow and a disco ball.
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Have you ever tried to recreate Cindy Crawford's iconic mole with makeup? It's like trying to draw a perfect circle on your face. I ended up looking like I got attacked by a stampede of confused ladybugs.
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Cindy Crawford's mole is so famous; it probably has its own agent. I can imagine it negotiating skincare endorsements and making cameo appearances in blockbuster movies. Meanwhile, my mole is just there, playing hide and seek with my dermatologist.
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Cindy Crawford's beauty is like a secret society that only gets better with time. I swear, every year she ages backward, and I'm over here aging like a coupon that expired yesterday.
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Cindy Crawford has been a supermodel for decades. If my career had a lifespan like hers, I'd be selling out arenas in my 80s, telling jokes like, "Back in my day, we had something called smartphones, not the telepathic holographic communicators you kids have now!
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You ever notice how Cindy Crawford has that iconic mole? I mean, it's like the GPS of beauty. You can be lost in a sea of faces, but as soon as you spot that mole, you're like, "Ah, found the gorgeous destination!
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