19 People With Covid Jokes

Puns

Updated on: Aug 10 2025

cancel
Rating
Sort By:
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
Why did the cell phone go to the doctor? It had a bad case of roaming charges!
What did the cheese say to itself in the mirror? Halloumi!
Why did the COVID-positive musician start a band? Because he had a good sense of taste in music!
What do you call a person who brings hand sanitizer to a date? An antibacterial romantic!
Why did the COVID test go to school? To get a little more cultured!
Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
What do you call a singing computer? Adele!

Six Feet of Separation

Social distancing has made dating a whole new challenge. I asked someone out recently, and they said, 'I can't, I'm practicing social distancing.' I said, 'How about a virtual date?' They replied, 'Great, I'll send you a hologram of me rolling my eyes.'

COVID Dreams

I had a dream the other night that I was at a party, and no one was wearing masks. I woke up in a cold sweat, not from the dream, but because my subconscious violated COVID guidelines. Even my own brain can't follow the rules!

COVID Confessions

You know you're in trouble when people start confessing things they did during quarantine. Yeah, officer, I did binge-watch the entire series, but in my defense, it was a matter of national importance. I was preventing the spread of COVID by staying on the couch.

DIY Health Check

I tried one of those DIY health checks at home. According to my online diagnosis, I've had every disease known to man, except COVID. Apparently, the internet thinks my symptoms are just a side effect of being alive.

Pandemic Pet Peeves

Pandemic pet peeves: You know what's worse than having COVID? The person who stands too close to you in the grocery line, as if the virus respects personal space. Back up, Karen; you're not getting my antibodies.

Home Alone: COVID Edition

Living with someone who has COVID is like a real-life version of Home Alone. You're just there, setting up booby traps of hand sanitizers and face masks, hoping the virus slips and falls on its way to infect you.

Quarantine Achievements

People talk about their quarantine achievements like they're Olympic medals. I baked bread, learned a new language, and conquered a thousand-piece puzzle. If there was a gold medal for avoiding productivity, I'd be an undisputed champion.

COVID Cuisine

When you're stuck at home, your culinary skills become legendary. Yeah, I mastered the art of cooking during lockdown. My signature dish? 'Quarantine Surprise.' It's a surprise because even I don't know what's in it. Just hope it's not COVID.

Mask Confusion

Wearing masks has turned us all into amateur detectives. I saw my neighbor with a mask, sunglasses, and a hat. I thought I was living next to a celebrity incognito. Turns out, it was just Bob from next door trying to avoid small talk.

Zoom Fashion Show

We've all become fashion experts during the pandemic. Forget Milan and Paris; the real runway is your Zoom call. Oh, you got the latest N95? Very chic. Is that a custom-designed hazmat suit, or did you make it yourself?

Post a Comment


How was your experience?
0 0 reviews
5 Stars
(0)
4 Stars
(0)
3 Stars
(0)
2 Stars
(0)
1 Stars
(0)

Topic of the day

Straighter-than
Aug 10 2025

0
Total Topics
0
Added Today