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Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Why did the scarecrow become a successful therapist? Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Once, I tried to impress my crush by telling a joke. The only thing that cracked was my self-esteem.
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Once, I decided to become a stand-up comedian. Now, my life is just one punchline after another, and my therapist has a waiting list.
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Once upon a time, I decided to try meditation. Let's just say, the only thing that got enlightened was my snooze button!
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Once, I attempted to join a gym. The only six-pack I got was from the vending machine in the lobby.
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Once, I attempted to be a morning person. My morning routine now involves hitting the snooze button and negotiating with my alarm clock.
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Once, I decided to take up gardening. Turns out, my plants have a black thumb, just like my sense of fashion.
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Once, I thought I could become a professional chef. My signature dish? Smoke alarms.
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Once, I tried to fix my own car. Let's just say, it's now officially a 'vintage' lawn ornament.
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Once, I decided to learn a new language. Now, I can confidently order a pizza in six different ways.
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