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Joke Types
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My friend bet me a dollar that I couldn't make a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on his face as I drove pasta in a minute!
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Why don't minutes ever get invited to parties? Because they always take up too much time!
Time’s Such a Minute Matter
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You ever notice how time is such a big deal? I mean, seriously, it's a minute-by-minute negotiation with yourself. I'll get up in a minute. I'll start working in a minute. And suddenly, you look at the clock, and it's been a minute since you said that five minutes ago! It's like the universe is in a constant standoff with your snooze button.
Cooking in a Minute
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I tried making one of those recipes that claim it takes only a minute. Spoiler alert: it took me 10 minutes to find the ingredients, another 10 minutes to chop them, and by the time I finished cooking, I realized the recipe was just for one bite. At this rate, I'll be ordering fast food in a minute.
Relationship Minutes
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My girlfriend told me she needs more quality time. So, now we've got this system where we schedule relationship minutes. I'm like, Babe, we just had three great minutes yesterday, can't we carry that momentum? I never thought my love life would be managed with a stopwatch, but hey, whatever keeps the romance ticking.
The Minute Rule
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They say if something takes less than a minute, you should do it immediately. So now, my apartment has zero dirty dishes, but my work inbox is a war zone. I'm mastering the art of selective productivity - just as long as it fits into that one-minute window.
The Minute Workout
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I decided to try this new workout routine they call the One-Minute Workout. You know, because who has more time than that? I'm there, giving it my all for 60 seconds, feeling accomplished, and then I realize I burned, like, one calorie. It turns out the only thing getting a workout is my stopwatch finger.
Laundry Minutes
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I attempted speed laundry because, you know, who has time to wait for the washer? I threw everything in, hit the express cycle, and my clothes came out in protest. It's like they were having a rebellious minute inside, staging a mini revolution against my impatience.
Minute Mysteries
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I tried reading a one-minute mystery book. The whole premise is solving a crime in 60 seconds. By the time I figured out who did it, the detective had already retired. Turns out, solving crimes is not a sprint; it's more of a marathon, and I'm still at the starting line.
The Last Minute Shopper
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I’m the king of last-minute shopping. My motto is: if I can’t find it in a minute, it wasn’t meant to be gifted. The cashier at the store now recognizes me as the guy who panics in the gift aisle, and honestly, I've become a regular in the forgotten birthday support group.
Minute Miracles
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I heard about these one-minute miracles. Like, Want to change your life? Just dedicate one minute to it. So, I tried it. I stood in front of the mirror for a minute, hoping to transform into a supermodel. Turns out, the only thing that changed was my patience level.
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