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Joke Types
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Did you hear about the doctor who became a chef? He mastered the art of 'organ'-izing flavors!
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Why did the skeleton go to medical school? To improve its 'bone' structure!
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Why did the nurse bring a red pen to work? In case she needed to draw blood, of course!
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Why did the doctor always carry a red pen? In case they needed to 'draw' conclusions!
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What's a doctor's favorite game? Operation, of course – they've been practicing it for years!
An Apple a Day Keeps the Doctor Away, Right?
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I asked a doctor friend for some health tips, and he said, An apple a day keeps the doctor away. So, now I'm eating apples like my life depends on it, hoping that the doctor will get the hint and stop sending me those medical bills.
The Diagnosis Dilemma
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I thought about becoming a doctor, but then I realized I'd have to break bad news to people. That's not my style. I'd be the doctor who says, You have a severe case of being awesome. It's incurable.
The Real Housecalls of Comedians
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I thought about being a doctor because I heard they make house calls. Then I realized, as a comedian, I make house calls too. You invite me over, and I bring my prescription for laughter. Side effects may include sore ribs and aching cheeks.
Laughing Therapy
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I considered going to medical school, but then I found out laughter is the best medicine. So, here I am, saving lives one punchline at a time. Who needs a stethoscope when you have a mic?
Med School Dropout
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You know, I almost went to medical school. Keyword: almost. But then I realized that diagnosing my own problems on WebMD was way cheaper and almost as accurate. Plus, who needs a degree when you have a solid internet connection?
Med School 101
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They say med school is tough. I disagree. Learning to write prescriptions with handwriting even a pharmacist can't decipher? That's the real challenge. I mean, I've seen hieroglyphics that were easier to read.
Dr. Google, MD
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I may not have a medical degree, but I'm pretty confident in my ability to self-diagnose using the internet. Last week, I diagnosed myself with a rare tropical disease. Turns out, I just had a bad case of wanderlust.
Procrastination Prescription
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I considered med school, but then I realized I'd have to memorize the entire human anatomy. I can't even remember where I left my keys half the time. Imagine a doctor saying, Oh, your heart is located... somewhere around here, I think.
Operation: Comedy
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I told my parents I wanted to be a surgeon, but they said I had hands like a butterfingered toddler. So, now I'm performing surgery on punchlines, trying not to butcher the jokes. It's a different kind of precision, you know?
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