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The Animal Rights Activist
Balancing love for lions with the harsh reality of a lion's natural behavior
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People say, "Lions are majestic creatures. They should roam free." I agree, but have you seen them try to hunt? They're basically nature's clumsy comedians.
The Lion Therapist
Helping lions deal with the stress of being kings and queens
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My lion client told me he's having relationship issues. I said, "Really? In the animal kingdom, I thought it was just 'love at first bite.' " He sighed and said, "Humans, you simplify everything.
The Lion Tamer
Trying to maintain authority in the animal kingdom
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The other day, I tried to show dominance by roaring back at the lion. He gave me this look like, "That's cute, human. I do this for a living.
The Comedian on Safari
Trying to tell jokes while lions are judging your sense of humor
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I told the lions, "I hear you're the kings of the jungle. Well, I'm the king of one-liners." They stared at me, unimpressed, as if to say, "Your kingdom is pretty small, buddy.
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