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My house looks like a war zone, and the battleground is the living room. Why? Because of kids under 10 and their toys. It's a daily struggle, a constant conflict. I step on Legos more often than I step on actual ground. And don't get me started on the toy sharing negotiations. It's like a United Nations summit, but instead of discussing world peace, we're arguing over who gets custody of the stuffed unicorn.
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Can we talk about bedtime with kids under 10? It's like negotiating a peace treaty in the Middle East. You've got the bedtime routine, the pajamas, the brushing teeth - it's a whole production. And just when you think you've won the battle and they're tucked in, they hit you with the classic line, "I need water." Water? You just had a gallon! Now I feel like a 24/7 room service. I'm thinking of installing a mini-fridge next to their beds and just be done with it.
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You know, they say kids under 10 are like little bundles of joy. Well, I've got a bundle of joy at home, and let me tell you, it's more like a bundle of chaos. I took my kid to a restaurant the other day, and they handed him a menu with pictures on it. I thought, "Great, finally a menu I can understand!" But no, he looked at it and said, "I want the one with the happy cow." Now, I'm stuck trying to decode the cryptic language of a toddler menu. Do they even teach this in culinary school?
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I recently discovered parenting apps, you know, those apps that claim to make parenting easier. I downloaded one, and it promised to help me keep track of my kid's schedule. Great, I thought, finally some order in this chaos. But you know what the app didn't account for? Kids under 10 have the attention span of a goldfish on caffeine. The schedule lasts about as long as a chocolate bar at a weight loss clinic. I'm starting to think the app was designed by someone who's never met a child in their life.
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