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What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Kids Under 10
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You ever try to have a serious conversation with a kid under 10? It's like negotiating with tiny, irrational dictators. You can't win an argument with someone whose comeback is just sticking out their tongue and making fart noises. I tried discussing the state of the economy with my nephew, and he responded by asking if Batman could beat up Superman. I mean, priorities, right?
Kids Under 10
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Kids under 10 have this amazing ability to turn any mundane task into a full-blown adventure. Trying to get them to eat vegetables is like negotiating a peace treaty. If you eat your broccoli, you can have dessert. It's like I'm a diplomat brokering a deal between warring factions. Diplomacy by dessert, the newest strategy at the United Nations.
Kids Under 10
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Kids under 10 have an uncanny ability to pick up on adult phrases and use them in the most awkward situations. I overheard my neighbor's kid telling his friend, My mom said life is like a box of chocolates. I'm just waiting for the day he drops a That's what she said during show-and-tell at school.
Kids Under 10
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You know you're dealing with kids under 10 when they think nap time is a form of punishment. They resist sleep like it's a prison sentence. I tried to explain the benefits of a good nap to my nephew, and he looked at me and said, I'll sleep when I'm dead. Buddy, you're 7. You've got a long way to go before that happens.
Kids Under 10
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Ever notice how kids under 10 have this amazing talent for turning everyday objects into weapons? I gave my nephew a cardboard box once, and within minutes, he had fashioned it into a sword, complete with sound effects. I've never been more impressed and terrified by someone's arts and crafts skills.
Kids Under 10
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Trying to get a group of kids under 10 to take a group photo is like herding cats with ADHD. It's chaos. Someone's picking their nose, another is doing a Fortnite dance, and one kid is just staring off into space contemplating the meaning of life. I've learned to embrace the candid chaos – it's like a Picasso painting, but with juice boxes and backpacks.
Kids Under 10
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I recently tried to explain the concept of time to my neighbor's 8-year-old. I said, You know, time waits for no one. He looked at me and said, Except Santa. He waits until everyone's asleep. Well, kid, that's a perspective I hadn't considered. Maybe Santa is the ultimate time management guru.
Kids Under 10
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Kids under 10 are like tiny detectives, always asking questions that you're not prepared to answer. Why is the sky blue? Why do birds fly? Why can't I have ice cream for breakfast? I don't know, kid, maybe because we're not in a Willy Wonka movie where everything is made of sugar. I tried to explain gravity to my niece, and she just looked at me and said, Well, I still think unicorns could fly if they wanted to.
Kids Under 10
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I tried to teach my niece about responsibility by giving her a goldfish to take care of. Two days later, the fish had a more extravagant funeral than most people I know. She insisted we have a procession and played Amazing Grace on her recorder. I didn't have the heart to tell her the fish was probably happier in that little toilet bowl.
Kids Under 10
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Have you ever played hide and seek with a kid under 10? It's like they think they've discovered a new dimension where they become invisible. I spent an hour once looking for my cousin's son. Turns out, he was hiding behind a curtain the whole time, giggling like he had outsmarted the FBI. I told him next time; I'm bringing a bloodhound.
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