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You ever try to have a serious conversation with a kid under 10? It's impossible. I asked my niece, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" She thought about it for a moment and then said, "A dinosaur princess." Well, that's not in the career guide I remember.
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Kids under 10 have this incredible talent for mispronouncing words. My neighbor's kid told me he wants to be a "fireman samurai" when he grows up. I mean, that's a profession I didn't know existed, but sign me up for that action movie.
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Kids under 10 are like little detectives. They ask questions about everything. My nephew asked me the other day, "Why is the sky blue?" I started explaining the whole scientific thing, and he just looked at me and said, "I don't know, I thought maybe you painted it." Touche, kid.
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Getting a kid under 10 to eat vegetables is like trying to negotiate world peace. You present them with broccoli, and suddenly it's like you're suggesting they consume an alien species. "What's this green thing, and why is it on my plate?" It's like playing vegetable roulette at dinner.
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Kids under 10 have this incredible knack for asking questions that you never thought you'd have to answer. My daughter asked me why the sun sets, and I went into this whole scientific explanation. She just looked at me and said, "I meant, why does it look so pretty?" Well played, young philosopher, well played.
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You ever notice how kids under 10 have this magical ability to turn any object into a toy? I handed my niece a cardboard box the other day, and suddenly, it was a spaceship, a castle, and a time machine. I'm just sitting here wondering why I wasted money on actual toys.
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Bedtime for kids under 10 is like negotiating a peace treaty with a hostile nation. It involves strategic negotiations, compromise, and the occasional threat of taking away their favorite toy. "Okay, one more story, but that's it. No negotiation on this.
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Ever notice how kids under 10 have a built-in radar for when you're on an important phone call? The moment you say, "I'll call you back," they magically appear with urgent questions about whether unicorns eat ice cream. It's like they have a hotline to interrupt your adulting.
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Trying to teach a kid under 10 how to tie their shoes is an exercise in patience. It's like coaching them through a complex NASA mission. "Okay, loop it here, swoop it there, and suddenly you're an astronaut of shoelaces." Houston, we have a bow.
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