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I was also thinking, in this tech-savvy world, there could be an app for everything, right? What if there was a kidnapping app? You could schedule your own kidnapping experience. Just swipe right for a mild, stress-relieving kidnapping or left for the full, adrenaline-pumping version. You'd rate your kidnapper like an Uber driver. "Five stars for the complimentary snacks, but the trunk was a bit cramped.
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You know, the other day, I was reading the news, and I came across this story about a guy who got kidnapped. Now, I know kidnapping is a serious thing, but this one was a little different. Apparently, the kidnapper felt bad for the guy because he looked so stressed out with his job and life that he decided to give him a little vacation! Can you believe that? I mean, who knew that in 2023, kidnapping would turn into a bizarre form of self-care? "Hey boss, I won't be able to make it to work this week. I've been kidnapped for some R&R.
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Now, after hearing this story, I started thinking – maybe we've been looking at kidnapping all wrong. What if we turn it into a do-it-yourself activity? Hear me out! You get a group of friends together, blindfold each other, throw yourselves in a van, and just drive around the block a few times. It's like an extreme team-building exercise. "Bob, you were terrible at navigation; we ended up in the same parking lot three times!
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So, they eventually caught the kidnapper, and during the trial, he was trying to argue that he did it for the greater good. He said, "I was just trying to give the guy a break from the daily grind!" I'm sitting there thinking, "Man, I've been stressed too, but I just take a bubble bath and call it a day. No one's ever tried to throw me in the trunk of a car for a spa day." I can just imagine the next big self-help trend: "Kidnapping Retreats – because sometimes you need a little 'me time' in a secret location.
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