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Joke Types
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Why do high IQ people love gardening? Because they have planty of intelligence!
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Why did the high IQ person become a gardener? Because they wanted to plant ideas and watch them grow.
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Why don't high IQ people need to watch cooking shows? They find them to be unfoodful.
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Why do high IQ people never lose arguments? They always have a Nobel defense.
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Why did the high IQ person bring a pencil to the party? In case they needed to draw attention.
IQ and Eyeglasses
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I recently got glasses, and the optometrist said, You've got a high IQ, but your eyesight is a bit low. I told him, Well, that's because my eyes are tired from constantly rolling them at people with low IQs.
Smartphone Struggles
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People with high IQs often have trouble with simple things. I mean, my smartphone is so smart that it autocorrects my texts to Shakespearean English. I just wanted to say LOL, not thou doth laugh heartily.
Overthinking Everything
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Having a high IQ means I overthink everything. My brain is like a browser with 100 tabs open, and they're all about whether I left the stove on, if aliens exist, and if anyone will ever find Waldo. It's exhausting being this intelligent... and paranoid.
Job Interviews
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I went for a job interview, and they asked if I had a high IQ. I said yes. They said, Great! Can you dumb it down a bit for the team? I guess they were hiring for the position of Chief Underachiever.
Too Smart for My Own Good
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I was at a party, and someone said, You have a high IQ, right? I replied, Yeah, so high that my GPS can't even locate where I left my keys.
Genius at Parties
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At parties, people always want to challenge me because of my high IQ. They're like, Let's play chess! I'm thinking, Can't we just play something simple, like hide and seek? I'm really good at hiding from social interactions.
Genius in the Kitchen
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I tried cooking a gourmet meal the other day. My high IQ told me to use exotic spices and unique ingredients. Let's just say my kitchen now looks like a crime scene, and the only thing gourmet about it is the pizza delivery number.
Smartphone vs. Me
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My smartphone constantly underestimates me. It's like, Did you mean 'there' instead of 'their'? No, smartphone, I have a high IQ; I know my homophones. But thanks for trying to dumb me down.
Brainy Breakups
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You know, having a high IQ is great and all, but it doesn't help much in relationships. My ex once told me, It's not you, it's me, and I responded with, Actually, based on your emotional intelligence, it's definitely you.
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