5 Jokes For Heaven's Gate

Double Meaning Jokes

Updated on: Jun 22 2025

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Heaven's IT Department

Angels trying to keep up with technological advancements in heaven
Imagine heaven's tech support dealing with prayers. "Yes, sir, I understand your request for a winning lottery ticket, but unfortunately, that's not a feature we currently support.

St. Peter at the Pearly Gates

St. Peter dealing with the influx of new souls
I bet St. Peter has some favorite excuses. "I know I was a bit of a troublemaker, but hear me out—I once held the door open for someone. That's gotta count for something, right?

God's Oversight Department

God managing the bureaucracy of heaven
You think God ever regrets creating humans? Like, he's looking down, saying, "I gave them free will, and what did they do with it? Invented pineapple pizza. Maybe I should have been more specific.

Heavenly Stand-Up Comedy Club

Stand-up comedians trying to make angels laugh
Heaven's comedy scene is so pure. No dirty jokes here, just jokes about clouds and halos. "I asked an angel if they could fly faster than the speed of light. They said, 'Well, we're not in a rush. We've got eternity.'

Archangel Complaining Department

Archangels dealing with angelic complaints
The Archangel HR department must be busy. "Michael, we've got angels wanting hazard pay for dealing with humans. Apparently, they're traumatized by all the 'dad jokes.'

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