bestTrending Topics
Joke Types
0
0
You ever notice how people always say, "That sounds fishy"? I mean, what's with the fish discrimination? Are fish inherently suspicious? Maybe they're just misunderstood. I picture fish having secret meetings underwater plotting against us, and we're up here like, "I knew it, something's fishy!" But seriously, why is it always fish? You never hear someone say, "That sounds reptilian" or "That sounds mammalian." No, it's always fishy. Maybe fish are just the rebels of the animal kingdom, and we're not giving them enough credit. Or maybe they're just offended that we use their name to describe sketchy situations. I can imagine a fish saying, "Hey, I'm not suspicious, you're the ones with the weird sayings!"
So next time someone says, "That sounds fishy," just tell them, "Well, maybe it sounds fishy because you're standing too close to the sushi bar, Karen!
0
0
I heard they're developing a new dating app exclusively for fish. Yeah, it's called "Plenty of Fins." You know, because fish have fins, and apparently, they need a dating app too. I can already imagine the profiles: "Likes long swims in the coral reef, enjoys deep conversations about plankton, and looking for a partner to create little fishy families with." But the real question is, how do fish swipe left or right with those fins? Is it like a graceful underwater dance, or do they just bump into each other and hope for the best? And what if they accidentally match with a catfish? That's got to be awkward.
I can see the tagline now: "Plenty of Fins - Where Finding Nemo meets Finding Your Nemo-mate!
0
0
You ever try to get out of something and come up with the lamest excuse? It's like, "Sorry, I can't make it to your party, I have to wash my goldfish." And then you realize, that's the lamest excuse ever. I mean, who washes a goldfish? But now I'm thinking, maybe we've been underestimating the hygiene habits of goldfish. Maybe they have fishy spa days, complete with tiny fishy bathrobes and cucumber slices for their eyes. And here we are, judging them for being low-maintenance pets.
So next time someone gives you a fishy excuse, just remember, maybe they're just trying to maintain their goldfish's impeccable hygiene standards.
0
0
I was thinking, if I could have any superpower, it would be the ability to communicate with fish. Imagine the possibilities! I'd be the Aquaman of the suburbs, solving neighborhood disputes by consulting with the wise old goldfish in Mrs. Johnson's backyard pond. But then I thought, what if fish have really boring conversations? Like, they're just swimming around gossiping about that annoying seagull or complaining about the cold water temperature. I'd be stuck with fish drama while superheroes with cooler powers are out there saving the world.
So, maybe it's better to stick to regular superpowers and leave the fish communication to Aquaman. I'll be over here, enjoying my ability to fly or turn invisible, while he's having a heated argument with a trout about who gets the best spot in the river.
Post a Comment