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Fencing is the only sport where you can win by stabbing someone, but you're not allowed to bring a fork to a dinner party. I mean, imagine applying fencing logic to Thanksgiving: "Sorry, Aunt Margaret, I'm just practicing my parries and lunges!
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Fencing is the only sport where if you accidentally bring a metal detector to the game, everyone will applaud your commitment to safety. "Well done, Gary! Always thinking ahead.
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Fencing is like the sophisticated version of rock-paper-scissors. I thrust, you parry; I lunge, you counter. It's the only game where you can win with a well-timed stab, and somehow it's considered elegant.
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Fencing is proof that if you give people weapons and call it a sport, suddenly it's classy. "I don't fight, darling, I fence. It's not violence; it's a duel of refinement. Pass me my sword, and let's engage in a highbrow skirmish, shall we?
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You ever notice how fencing is the only sport where people try to stab each other politely? It's like, "En garde, sir! After you. No, I insist, go ahead and thrust first. Very civilized attempt at mayhem we've got here.
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Fencing is the only sport where it's perfectly acceptable to shout, "I've been foiled!" without anyone thinking you messed up. It's not defeat; it's just acknowledging the brilliance of your opponent's foil work.
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You know you're watching fencing when you hear phrases like "en garde" and "touché," and you're not at a fancy French restaurant. It's like a secret society with swords – the first rule of Fencing Club is you don't talk about Fencing Club unless you can properly execute a riposte.
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Have you ever watched fencing and thought, "This is the only time where 'Good defense is the best offense' isn't just a saying, it's a strategy." It's like, forget scoring points, let's just not get stabbed.
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Fencing must be the only sport where the participants are equally prepared for battle and a Broadway musical. They've got the costumes, the dramatic lunges, and the whole "dance of swords" vibe going on. Someone get these folks a spotlight!
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