bestTrending Topics
Joke Types
0
0
You ever notice how doctors give the worst birthday gifts? It's like they took the Hippocratic Oath against choosing a decent present. Last year, my doctor gave me a self-help book titled "How to Deal with Hypochondriacs." Thanks, doc, I'll add it to my growing collection of imaginary illnesses. And the birthday card? It had a picture of a smiling pill on it, with a caption that said, "Wishing you a dose of happiness!" I appreciate the sentiment, but I'm pretty sure prescribing joy is not covered by my insurance.
I imagine the conversation at the pharmacy went like this: "What's the dosage for laughter?" And the pharmacist is like, "Take two jokes and call me in the morning.
0
0
You know, I recently went to my doctor's birthday party. Yeah, you heard that right. I didn't even know doctors celebrated birthdays; I thought they just had a secret society where they exchanged stethoscopes and high-fived over medical charts. So, I walk into this party, and everyone is dressed in scrubs. I'm thinking, "Is this a costume party, or do these people just love their work attire that much?" I mean, who wants to party in something that says, "I'm ready to check your blood pressure at any given moment"?
The cake was something else. Instead of candles, they had syringes sticking out of it. I half-expected them to start prescribing slices to cure our sweet tooth.
I tried to make a toast, you know, lighten the mood. I said, "Here's to the doctor who always knows where it hurts, and to us, who never listen to their advice!" Let's just say they laughed a bit nervously.
0
0
You ever feel like doctors throw birthday parties just to test our reflexes? I went to a surprise birthday party for my surgeon friend, and let me tell you, it was more nerve-wracking than waiting for the anesthesia to kick in. The lights went off, and everyone yelled, "Surprise!" I jumped so high; I think I set a new record for vertical leaps. If this was an Olympic sport, I'd be a gold medalist. I haven't been that startled since the last time WebMD told me I had a rare tropical disease.
I turned to my friend and said, "Doc, you just gave me a heart palpitation. Where's your defibrillator when you need it?
0
0
I had a checkup the other day, and my doctor told me it's crucial to celebrate birthdays for good health. I'm thinking, "Is this medical advice, or did he just want an excuse to bill my insurance for a 'birthday wellness consultation'?" He said, "Laughter is the best medicine." So, I asked him if he could write me a prescription for a Netflix comedy special. He didn't seem amused, but hey, he's the one who started with the comedy advice.
I can see it now: "Doctor's Orders: One daily dose of stand-up comedy, two servings of cake, and a side of laughter therapy.
Post a Comment