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You know you're dealing with a serious pet lover when they start using their deceased dog's name as a password. It's like, "I can't forget my login, Rover1234. It's in loving memory, okay?
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You know you're an adult when your idea of a wild Friday night is staying up late to watch "Marley and Me" and ugly crying into a tub of ice cream. Because nothing says party like contemplating the fragility of life through a dog's journey, right?
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Speaking of dead dogs, has anyone else noticed that the pet cemetery is like the high society of the animal kingdom? You've got pedigrees mingling with mutts, and it's the only place where a chihuahua can be buried next to a great dane without anyone judging their size difference.
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And lastly, I've realized that dogs have this magical ability to turn any bad day around. You come home stressed, and they're there, tail wagging, like, "I don't know what happened at work, but I've been waiting for you, and that's all that matters.
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You ever notice how when your neighbor's dog passes away, suddenly the entire neighborhood becomes a pet grief counseling center? It's like everyone's got a PhD in canine condolences overnight.
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Have you ever noticed how dogs can be the best alarm clocks? Except, instead of a gentle wake-up call, it's more like being jolted out of bed by a furry, four-legged siren that's convinced today is the day you'll finally conquer the mailman.
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I recently realized that dogs are the only creatures who can simultaneously make you feel loved and guilty. They look at you with those puppy eyes, and suddenly you find yourself apologizing for leaving them alone to go to work. I mean, can you blame them? "Dead dogs" might just be their passive-aggressive way of saying, "You left me alone for too long.
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Have you ever tried explaining the concept of a pet funeral to someone who doesn't have pets? It's like, "Yeah, we're having a little ceremony for Fluffy. No, it's not weird. Yes, there will be tiny dog-sized caskets. And no, we're not insane, just pet owners.
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I've come to the conclusion that a dog's favorite game is "Let's pretend I'm a vacuum cleaner." You drop a crumb, and they appear out of nowhere, ready to devour it faster than you can say, "RIP leftovers.
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