18 Jokes For Dead Celebrity

Puns

Updated on: Nov 20 2024

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Why did the dead celebrity start a gardening club? Because they had a talent for 'pushing up daisies'!
Why did the dead comedian go to heaven? To deliver some killer jokes!
What's a dead actor's favorite party game? Charades, of corpse!
What do you call a dead actor's rehearsal space? A 'grave'yard!
What did the deceased rockstar say to the pearly gates? 'Let me in, I promise I won't make too much noise!
Why did the deceased musician open a bakery? Because they wanted to make sure their bread always had a little extra 'dough'!
Why did the dead celebrity break up with their ghostly partner? They needed space!
Why did the ghost comedian get booed off stage? Because his jokes were too 'transparent'!

Dead Celebrity Party

You ever think about what a dead celebrity party would be like? I mean, I imagine they're all gathered up there in the afterlife, sipping on ghostly cocktails. Elvis is trying to teach Marilyn Monroe some dance moves, and Michael Jackson is arguing with Beethoven about who's the real king of pop. It's a heavenly showdown of the greatest performers in history, and God is the ultimate talent show judge.

Dead Celebrities' Anonymous

I heard there's a support group up there for celebrities who just can't let go of their earthly fame. It's called Dead Celebrities' Anonymous. Elvis stands up and says, Hi, I'm Elvis, and I've been dead for 40 years, but I still can't resist a good comeback tour in the afterlife.

Heaven's Got Talent

Heaven must have its own talent show, right? I can picture Simon Cowell up there, critiquing performances from the likes of Shakespeare's ghost doing stand-up comedy. Sorry, William, but 'To be or not to be' just doesn't have the same impact as 'You're not going to Hollywood.'

The Real Ghostbusters

I bet the real Ghostbusters are celebrities up there. They're probably giving autographs to the ghosts of haunted houses, signing proton packs, and posing for selfies with the undead. Who you gonna call? Ghost celebs!

Haunted Hollywood Squabbles

I bet in the celebrity afterlife, they have their own version of Hollywood Squares. The top center square is always reserved for a ghostly host like Casper, and the contestants are all these dead celebrities competing for the best spectral spot. I can already hear them arguing, Move over, Shakespeare, I need space for my ghostly Shakespearean soliloquy!

Social Media for the Deceased

I heard they're working on a new social media platform exclusively for dead celebrities. Imagine getting a friend request from Abraham Lincoln, and his profile picture is just a top hat and a beard. But then you realize he's still posting those cryptic status updates like, Just saw the Gettysburg Address, #NailedIt. It's like they never really rest in peace, just continue to haunt your newsfeed.

Ghostly Paparazzi Problems

You think ghost celebrities have to deal with ghostly paparazzi? Imagine trying to haunt a house in peace, and there's a bunch of ethereal photographers floating around, trying to capture your spectral moments. Hey, can't a ghost have a private haunting without ending up on the cover of 'Spectral Weekly'?

Haunted Hollywood Walk of Fame

In the afterlife, they probably have a Haunted Hollywood Walk of Fame. Instead of handprints, you've got ghostly apparitions leaving ectoplasmic footprints. Oh, look, there's Albert Einstein's ghost, and his footprint has an equation for relativity written in ectoplasm.

Celestial Comedy Roast

I heard they have a celestial comedy roast where dead comedians roast each other for eternity. George Carlin takes the stage and says, Heaven's great, but the bureaucracy is killing me. I asked St. Peter for a fast pass, and he said, 'You think this is Disney World?' It's a laugh riot up there, and the audience is literally dying.

Ouija Board Autographs

Imagine going to a paranormal convention and getting a Ouija board signed by famous ghosts. Dear fan, thanks for summoning me. Love, Cleopatra. And you know they'd be charging extra for those rare signatures from the ghosts who don't usually communicate. Yeah, that'll be two soul coins for a signature from Bigfoot's ghost.

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