bestTrending Topics
Joke Types
0
0
You ever have a crush? Oh man, crushes are like emotional gymnastics. I've got this crush, and I'm trying to be cool, you know? But being cool around your crush is like trying to eat a cupcake without getting frosting on your face - impossible! I decided to impress my crush with my intellect. I said, "You know, I'm reading a lot of Shakespeare lately." And they were like, "Oh, really? Which one's your favorite?" Now, I panicked because the only Shakespeare I know is from that one episode of Friends. So, I confidently said, "I love the one where Joey says 'To be or not to be.'" Smooth, right?
And then there's that moment when your crush walks in, and your brain turns into a malfunctioning GPS. It's like, "Make eye contact... no, not too much, act casual... okay, now smile! Oh no, too much, abort mission!"
So, yeah, crushes are like playing chess with your emotions, and I'm over here stuck on checkers.
0
0
Texting your crush is like defusing a bomb. You stare at your phone, contemplating each word. "Hey" might be too casual, but "Greetings, fair maiden" is a bit much. It's a linguistic tightrope, and I've fallen off more times than I'd like to admit. And then there's the waiting game. You send a message, and suddenly your phone becomes a time machine, taking you to the past, present, and future all at once. "Did they see it yet? Are they typing? Why aren't they typing? Maybe they hate the letter 'Y'; that's why they're not replying."
I tried using emojis to convey my feelings, but now I'm convinced emojis were created by aliens who are studying human communication. I sent a heart emoji, and they replied with a thumbs up. Thumbs up? Is this a motivational seminar?
So, crush texting is like trying to interpret ancient hieroglyphics. If only there was a Rosetta Stone for decoding the language of love through text.
0
0
You ever find yourself deep into social media stalking your crush? Come on, don't pretend like you haven't scrolled through their photos at 2 AM, feeling like an undercover agent on a mission to gather intel. I'm practically Sherlock Holmes with a smartphone. I zoomed in on a picture they posted three years ago, analyzed the background, and deduced they went to a coffee shop. So, naturally, I started frequenting every coffee shop in a five-mile radius, hoping for a serendipitous encounter.
But social media can be a double-edged sword. One minute you're innocently scrolling through their vacation photos, and the next, you're six years deep into their cousin's best friend's dog's profile, questioning all your life choices.
And then there's the accidental like. You know, when you're scrolling so intensely, and your thumb slips, and suddenly you've liked a photo from 2010. Smooth move, right? It's like accidentally waving at someone in a crowd, but instead of waving, you've just declared your love for their past self.
So, here's a tip: if you're going to be a social media detective, wear a metaphorical disguise and practice your stealthy scrolling. Because in the world of crushes, ignorance might not be bliss, but it's definitely less embarrassing.
0
0
You ever get stuck in the friend zone? It's like winning a ticket to a theme park and finding out it's closed for renovations. I've been in the friend zone so long; I should have a loyalty card with stamps for every awkward hug and sympathetic smile. I asked my crush out, and they hit me with the classic, "You're such a great friend." Great friend? That's not what I was aiming for! It's like going to a job interview, acing it, and then the employer says, "You're so good; we'll just pay you in exposure."
But here's the thing - the friend zone is deceptive. You think you're chilling on a friendly beach, but suddenly you realize you're stranded on an emotional desert island with no way back to Romance City.
So, if you're in the friend zone, remember, it's not the end of the world; it's just the beginning of a really long, scenic route to relationshipville.
Post a Comment