4 Crush Over Text Jokes

Standup-Comedy Bits

Updated on: Jul 01 2025

cancel
Rating
Sort By:
You ever have a crush and think, "Hey, maybe I'll impress them with my amazing texting skills!" Yeah, well, I tried that. You know, you start with the basics: "Hey, what's up?" Smooth, right? But then, you enter this texting minefield. It's like, "Do I use a smiley face or is that too forward? Is 'LOL' too casual for this moment?" Before you know it, you're consulting a text etiquette manual. And let's not even talk about the stress of waiting for that little "typing" bubble to appear. It's like the digital version of watching a pot boil. If you're not careful, you'll end up in a Shakespearean tragedy, where the only thing dying is your chances with your crush.
You ever try to impress your crush with your intelligence over text, only to be sabotaged by autocorrect? It's like my phone has a mind of its own, playing a cruel game of predictive text sabotage. I once wanted to say, "I think you're amazing," but thanks to autocorrect, it became, "I stink you're Amazon." Yeah, that's a real confidence booster. Now, instead of being smooth, I sound like a malfunctioning robot. Autocorrect, my wingman? More like my wing-fail.
You ever get so invested in a text conversation with your crush that you start planning your future together, only for them to suddenly disappear like a magician's assistant in a smoke-filled room? It's the classic ghosting move. I call it the Houdini of love. One moment, you're sharing your deepest secrets, and the next, they're pulling a disappearing act that even David Blaine would envy. You start questioning everything. Did they receive my last text? Did I say something wrong? Maybe they're just stuck in a tunnel with no cell service. Yeah, that's it. They're not ghosting; they're spelunking without Wi-Fi. Love in the digital age, where disappearing acts are the new normal.
Can we talk about emojis for a second? I mean, who would've thought that in the 21st century, we'd be using tiny, animated faces to express our deepest feelings? I recently found myself in a situation where I had a crush, and my emoji game was put to the test. I thought I was being cute with a simple heart emoji, but then I got paranoid. What if they read it as a friendly heart? Maybe I should have added the sparkle emoji for extra emphasis? Suddenly, my phone turned into a digital art canvas, and I was Picasso trying to paint the masterpiece of modern romance. Spoiler alert: I'm no Picasso.

Post a Comment


How was your experience?
0 0 reviews
5 Stars
(0)
4 Stars
(0)
3 Stars
(0)
2 Stars
(0)
1 Stars
(0)

Topic of the day

Go-somewhere
Jul 01 2025

0
Total Topics
0
Added Today