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I've noticed that creepy guys have a particular fondness for outdated pickup lines. Like, buddy, it's 2024; "Are you a Wi-Fi signal? Because I'm feeling a connection" stopped being charming around the same time dial-up internet did.
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Why is it that creepy guys always seem to be experts at finding obscure details about your life? You'll be at a party, and out of nowhere, a stranger is like, "Oh, you're the person who owns a cat named Mr. Whiskers, right?" And you're just left wondering who's been browsing your social media.
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Ever had a creepy guy try to impress you by revealing he's a mind reader? Yeah, sure, Gary, you knew I was thinking about changing my shampoo brand, not that you've been following me around the store for the past ten minutes.
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Do you ever get the feeling that creepy guys attended a seminar on unpredictable timing? They show up when you least expect it, like during a yawn or when you're mid-sip of a hot beverage. It's like they have a sixth sense for the most inconvenient moments.
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Why is it that creepy guys always choose the eeriest spots to strike up a conversation? You'll find yourself cornered in a dimly lit hallway, and suddenly it's like you're in a scene from a suspense thriller, with the ominous soundtrack playing in the background.
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Creepy guys have this uncanny ability to ruin perfectly innocent activities. You could be enjoying a quiet stroll in the park, and then bam, there's a dude lurking behind a tree like he's auditioning for a role in "Hide and Seek: The Unsettling Edition.
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I've concluded that creepy guys must have a secret handbook on awkward gestures. Have you ever been greeted with the combination of a wink, finger guns, and an overly enthusiastic thumbs up? It's like they're trying to communicate in the language of discomfort.
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You ever notice how creepy guys always seem to have a talent for appearing out of thin air? It's like they majored in Stealth Mode 101. One moment you're alone, and the next, there's a guy behind you whispering, "Nice weather we're having.
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Creepy guys have mastered the art of standing perfectly still. You'll think it's just a lamppost, but nope, it's Gary from accounting waiting for you to pass by so he can strike up an awkward conversation about staplers.
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