10 Jokes About Creepy Guys

Observational Jokes

Updated on: Jun 12 2024

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I've noticed that creepy guys have a particular fondness for outdated pickup lines. Like, buddy, it's 2024; "Are you a Wi-Fi signal? Because I'm feeling a connection" stopped being charming around the same time dial-up internet did.
Why is it that creepy guys always seem to be experts at finding obscure details about your life? You'll be at a party, and out of nowhere, a stranger is like, "Oh, you're the person who owns a cat named Mr. Whiskers, right?" And you're just left wondering who's been browsing your social media.
Ever had a creepy guy try to impress you by revealing he's a mind reader? Yeah, sure, Gary, you knew I was thinking about changing my shampoo brand, not that you've been following me around the store for the past ten minutes.
Do you ever get the feeling that creepy guys attended a seminar on unpredictable timing? They show up when you least expect it, like during a yawn or when you're mid-sip of a hot beverage. It's like they have a sixth sense for the most inconvenient moments.
Why is it that creepy guys always choose the eeriest spots to strike up a conversation? You'll find yourself cornered in a dimly lit hallway, and suddenly it's like you're in a scene from a suspense thriller, with the ominous soundtrack playing in the background.
Creepy guys have this uncanny ability to ruin perfectly innocent activities. You could be enjoying a quiet stroll in the park, and then bam, there's a dude lurking behind a tree like he's auditioning for a role in "Hide and Seek: The Unsettling Edition.
I've concluded that creepy guys must have a secret handbook on awkward gestures. Have you ever been greeted with the combination of a wink, finger guns, and an overly enthusiastic thumbs up? It's like they're trying to communicate in the language of discomfort.
You ever notice how creepy guys always seem to have a talent for appearing out of thin air? It's like they majored in Stealth Mode 101. One moment you're alone, and the next, there's a guy behind you whispering, "Nice weather we're having.
Creepy guys have mastered the art of standing perfectly still. You'll think it's just a lamppost, but nope, it's Gary from accounting waiting for you to pass by so he can strike up an awkward conversation about staplers.
I've realized that creepy guys have an innate ability to make eye contact at the most inappropriate times. You could be grocery shopping, trying to decide between apples and oranges, and suddenly, there's a dude staring at you like you're the last item on the shelf.

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