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Joke Types
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What do cold callers and penguins have in common? They both love a good icebreaker!
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What's a cold caller's favorite sport? Telemarketing, because it's all about making those cold calls!
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Why did the cold caller bring a ladder to work? They wanted to take their sales to a whole new level!
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What do you call a cold caller who becomes a chef? A sales chef, always cooking up leads!
The Silent Treatment
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I've started answering unknown calls with silence. It's my new strategy for dealing with telemarketers. They'll be like, Hello? Hello? And I'm just there, enjoying the peaceful sound of their confusion.
Phone Freeze
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I got a call the other day from a telemarketer. They asked, Are you interested in a fantastic opportunity? I said, Sure, tell me about a button that blocks all telemarketers. They hung up. Guess they weren't interested in my opportunity.
Caller ID Confusion
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I have this amazing technology called caller ID. It's fantastic. It tells me exactly who's calling, so I can decide whether to answer or not. The only problem is, it doesn't have a feature that says, Definitely a telemarketer – proceed with caution.
The Whispering Telemarketer
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Why do telemarketers whisper when they leave voicemails? It's like they're trying to sell me something top-secret. Psst, hey, it's Bob from the amazing widget company. Call me back if you want the deal of a lifetime... and don't let anyone know!
Rejected by Robots
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I received a robo-call saying, Press 1 for a special offer! So, I pressed 1 and waited. After a minute, the robot said, Sorry, this offer is not available in your area. Well, thanks for making me feel special, automated voice. I feel the rejection.
Cold Calling Catastrophes
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You know, they say cold calling is a great way to make sales. I tried it once. My refrigerator answered and said, Listen, buddy, I don't need any more ice. I'm not interested in your frozen deals!
Voicemail Vendetta
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I got a voicemail from a telemarketer that said, Press 2 to be removed from our list. So, I pressed 2, and the next day, I got another call. I'm starting to think their removal list is just a trap to see how many times I'm willing to press buttons out of sheer desperation.
Telemarketer Mind Games
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Telemarketers always play mind games. They ask, How are you today? I respond with, I'm fantastic, thank you for asking. By the way, how's your day going? Suddenly, they're the ones hanging up. I guess they weren't prepared for a conversation.
Wrong Number Wisdom
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I got a call from a telemarketer who mispronounced my name. I said, You had me at the wrong name, but hey, let's chat about your amazing product. What's it called again? Oh, never mind, wrong number!
Telemarketing Time Travel
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You ever notice how telemarketers always call at the most inconvenient times? It's like they have a time machine set to Interrupt dinner and Annoy during family time. If I had a time machine, I'd use it for something better, like finding out who thought cold calling was a good idea.
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