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Joke Types
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Why did the punctuation break up with the letters? They just couldn't make a point together!
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Why was the grammar book feeling sad? It had too many commas, but no one to pause for!
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Why did the English teacher break up with the dictionary? It couldn't define their relationship!
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I told my friend he needs to work on his English pronunciation. He said, 'I speak perfect broken English – it's an art!
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Why did the verb go to therapy? It had too much tense and couldn't relax!
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I told my friend he should write a book in broken English. He said, 'I novel idea!
Meeting the In-Laws
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I met my partner's parents, and they asked about my family. I said, My family is good. We have many potato. I meant to say pets, but now my in-laws think I come from a long line of potato farmers.
Language Barrier Therapy
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I tried couples therapy with my significant other to overcome the language barrier. The therapist asked, What brings you here? I replied, We here because English no cooperate. Needless to say, the therapist needed a translator for our translator.
Auto-Correct Woes
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You know, auto-correct and broken English are like frenemies. I tried texting, I'm on my way, and auto-correct changed it to I'm on my llama. I didn't know whether to laugh or start checking the backyard for unexpected livestock.
Cooking Adventures
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I attempted to follow a recipe with broken English instructions. The recipe said, Fold in gently, and I ended up having a heart-to-heart conversation with my flour. I think my cookies needed a therapy session after that.
Secret Agent Mishaps
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I tried playing secret agent with broken English. I walked into a spy meeting and said, I undercover like ninja. They assigned me to surveillance duty at the local karaoke bar. Apparently, even spies need a good laugh.
Siri, Lost in Translation
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I recently asked Siri for directions using my broken English, and she replied, Did you mean: The Bermuda Triangle? I just wanted to get to the grocery store, but apparently, Siri thinks my broken English is leading me on some mystical journey.
Job Interview Confessions
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At a job interview, they asked about my strengths, and I said, I am very good at the broken English. They must have thought I was applying for a position as the official translator for charades.
Lost in Translation
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You ever notice how broken English is like a secret code? I tried ordering sushi once, and I swear the waiter thought I was casting a spell. I asked for a dragon roll, and he gave me a puzzled look like I was summoning Godzilla in the kitchen.
Adventures in Online Shopping
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I tried ordering a mystery box online, and in the delivery notes, I wrote, Send surprise. I received a box of broken English dictionaries. I guess the surprise was on me for thinking they'd decipher my own language.
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