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Why did the mother computer go to therapy? Too many bytes of emotional baggage!
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Why did the mother hen apply for a job? She wanted to make a little extra egg-salary!
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Why did the mother potato scold her child? Because it was a little mashed!
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Why did the mother cow enroll her calf in school? Because it wanted to be a little brrr-ighter!
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Why did the mother broom ask for a day off? She was tired of sweeping me off my feet!
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Why did the mother broom go to therapy? She had too many unresolved issues!
Silence is Suspicious
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If you ever think your house is too quiet, just remember, silence is golden... unless you're a mom. Then it's suspicious. Very, very suspicious.
The Car Chronicles
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They say a cluttered desk is a sign of a genius. If that's true, then my minivan is a mobile think tank. I've got snacks, toys, and emergency supplies for any toddler apocalypse.
The Mom Uniform
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You know you're a mom when your daily outfit consists of yoga pants, a messy bun, and a stain you're hoping is just chocolate. It's called Casual Mom-chic, look it up!
The Chronicles of Diaper Duty
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You know you're a mom when your best accessories become under-eye bags and a baby wipe in the back pocket. It's the latest in high fashion, trust me.
Sleep or No Sleep
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They say sleep is for the weak. As a mom, I say sleep is for those who can successfully negotiate a bedtime with a toddler. I must be Hercules then!
The Dinner Dilemma
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Being a mother means mastering the art of preparing a five-star gourmet meal, only to have it rejected for a PB&J sandwich. It's like Gordon Ramsay meets a picky toddler.
The Laundry Olympics
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You think folding laundry is easy? Try folding a fitted sheet with a toddler on your hip and a teenager complaining about mismatched socks. I call it the Mom's Decathlon.
Supermom Syndrome
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They say moms have eyes in the back of their heads. I thought it was a myth until I caught my toddler red-handed with a cookie behind his back. The jig is up, kiddo!
Master of Disguise
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Being a mom turns you into a detective. Forget Sherlock Holmes; I can find a lost toy in the dark, identify mystery stains, and decode toddler gibberish. Call me Mama Holmes.
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