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I saw a beggar with a sign that said, "Why lie? Need beer money." At least he's honest. I appreciate the transparency. It's like the most refreshing honesty in the midst of financial desperation.
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Have you ever been caught in that awkward moment when someone is begging, and you don't have any change, so you pretend to be on an important phone call? "Sorry, I can't right now, Bill Gates. Yeah, he's on the other line, too.
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I saw a guy begging with a sign that said, "My ex-wife had a better lawyer." Well, at least he's not bitter... or maybe he's just banking on the sympathy vote.
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You ever notice how when someone's begging for spare change on the street, they suddenly develop the most impressive dance moves? It's like, "I don't have any cash, but here's a dollar for that unexpected moonwalk!
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Begging has become so high-tech now. I saw a guy the other day with a QR code on his cardboard sign. I mean, I didn't have any spare change, but I could have sent him a Bitcoin or something.
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I find it interesting that people who beg for money always seem to have the most elaborate stories. "I just need $5 for a bus ticket." Dude, I've seen you here every day for a month – are you commuting to the moon?
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I was walking down the street, and a beggar asked me for a dollar. I said, "Sorry, I only have plastic." He pulled out a card reader. I didn't see that one coming. I almost wanted to tip him extra for being so technologically advanced in his begging game.
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You ever notice that people begging for money have the most creative pet names for their dogs? "This is my dog, Spare Change. He's my financial advisor." Well, at least someone in the relationship has a job.
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Begging has evolved into a competitive sport. I saw a guy with a sign that said, "My cardboard is biodegradable, and so is my sense of shame." I guess if you're gonna beg, you might as well be eco-friendly.
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