5 A Catholic Men's Retreat Jokes

Double Meaning Jokes

Updated on: Nov 18 2024

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The Unwilling Attendee

Forced into attending the retreat against their will.
They promised this retreat would be 'life-changing.' It was. I now have a life-changing desire to never attend another one.

The Lost Newbie

Completely bewildered and lost among the rituals and terminology.
They told us to 'embrace the unknown.' I accidentally hugged the wrong guy during the 'trust circle.' It wasn't enlightening; it was just awkward.

The Skeptic Trying to Fit In

Highly skeptical about the retreat's effectiveness but trying not to stand out.
I tried to 'embrace the silence' they talk about here. But after two hours, the loudest thing in the room was my stomach growling. I think it's trying to start its own spiritual journey.

The Secretly Bored Expert

Already well-versed in spirituality, finds the retreat too basic.
I tried to suggest an advanced mindfulness technique. They looked at me like I suggested building a rocket. I guess 'levitating while meditating' isn't on the syllabus.

The Overzealous Participant

Desperate to connect with spirituality but struggling with the mundane realities of the retreat.
They said this retreat would help me find my calling. Well, I found it. It's the phone in my room that's been ringing off the hook, probably someone from the office wondering why I suddenly disappeared. Turns out my 'calling' might be work-related.

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