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You know, I was talking to a group of 12-year-olds the other day, and I must say, these kids are like tiny philosophers. They've got insights that make you question your life choices. I asked one of them, "What's the secret to happiness?" And this kid looked me dead in the eyes and said, "Unlimited screen time." I mean, forget about all those self-help books and meditation apps; the answer was right in front of us the whole time. These kids have cracked the code. They're like, "Why bother with inner peace when you can have outer chaos with video games and TikTok?"
Seems like we should be taking life advice from 12-year-olds. They've got it all figured out. Maybe the meaning of life is just a really cool Fortnite dance.
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Talking to 12-year-olds is like navigating a minefield. You never know what innocent question will trigger an existential crisis. I asked one kid, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" And he replied, "Not disappointed." I was expecting the typical astronaut or superhero answer, not a mini nihilist. It's like, "Okay, buddy, let's aim a little lower. How about 'happy adult with a stable job'?"
And have you noticed how 12-year-olds negotiate? They're like tiny lawyers. You tell them they can't have something, and suddenly they're presenting a well-researched case on why candy should be a part of their daily nutrition.
I've started recording these conversations for future reference. It's like having my own personal legal team, but with a fondness for gummy bears.
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I was helping a 12-year-old with his homework, and let me tell you, it's like they've invented a new language. Math problems look like hieroglyphics, and don't even get me started on the essays. I asked the kid what his essay was about, and he said, "The impact of Wi-Fi on my emotional well-being." I remember when homework was about dinosaurs and the solar system. Now it's about the psychological effects of Wi-Fi withdrawal. I feel like I need a degree in child psychology just to understand their assignments.
And when did coloring inside the lines become a thing of the past? The kid handed me a drawing and said, "It's abstract." I'm pretty sure Picasso didn't start his artistic journey with coloring books.
So, if you ever need a reality check, just try helping a 12-year-old with their homework. It's a humbling experience.
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You ever try explaining technology to a 12-year-old? It's like teaching calculus to a cat. They look at you with those judgmental eyes, like you just stepped out of a time machine from the Stone Age. I handed a 12-year-old a floppy disk the other day, and he stared at it like I was offering him an ancient artifact. He asked, "Is this a 3D-printed save button?"
And don't get me started on social media. I asked a kid about MySpace, and he thought I was talking about a new NASA project. "Oh yeah, MySpace exploration, right? Do they have TikTok on Mars?"
I'm starting to feel like a living relic. Pretty soon, they'll be teaching about me in history class. "And here, kids, is the ancient being who used to type 'lol' instead of using the laughing emoji.
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