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Let's talk about 11-year-olds and homework. I asked one of them, "How's school going?" and this kid looks at me dead in the eye and says, "Homework is basically a conspiracy to ruin my social life." I couldn't help but burst into laughter because, honestly, I relate. I miss the days when my biggest concern was which Power Ranger I wanted to be, not quadratic equations. These kids are geniuses, though. One of them told me, "If you want to finish your homework fast, write really big." I'm thinking, "Wow, why didn't I think of that when I was in school?" Forget about the quality of the work; just make those letters as massive as your procrastination guilt.
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So, 11-year-old kids today are practically born with smartphones in their hands. I asked one of them, "What's your favorite app?" and he goes, "The one that turns my dad into a dinosaur." I didn't even know that was a thing! I mean, when I was a kid, the coolest app I had was Snake on my Nokia, and now these kids are transforming their parents into prehistoric creatures for entertainment. And don't even get me started on their tech troubleshooting skills. One kid told me, "If your computer is slow, just blow on the keyboard." I tried it, and now I'm banned from the library. Who knew 11-year-olds held the secrets to tech support?
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You ever wonder what's happening in those lunchrooms at schools? I asked an 11-year-old about their culinary experiences, and they said, "The cafeteria food is like a mystery box. You never know if it's edible until you take that first bite." I'm thinking, "Is this a school or an episode of MasterChef Junior?" But here's the kicker: one kid told me, "If you don't like the school lunch, just bring a toaster to class and make your own grilled cheese." I'm imagining a classroom full of kids with mini toasters creating a grilled cheese revolution. Move over, Gordon Ramsay, the 11-year-olds are taking over the kitchen.
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You know, I was talking to some 11-year-old kids the other day, and let me tell you, they've got this whole life thing figured out. I asked them, "What's the secret to happiness?" and one kid goes, "Pizza and video games, dude!" I mean, who needs therapy when you can have pepperoni and a joystick, right? They've basically distilled the meaning of life down to cheat codes and extra cheese. But then, another kid chimes in and says, "Nah, happiness is when your mom forgets it's your turn to do the dishes!" Now, that's some profound philosophy right there. I'm thinking of adopting that mantra for my own well-being. "Sorry, honey, can't do the dishes tonight. It's my path to happiness, you understand?
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