4 Jokes For Tweet

Standup-Comedy Bits

Updated on: Jul 01 2024

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Can we talk about auto-correct for a second? I mean, I appreciate the effort, but sometimes it feels like my phone is trying to break up relationships. I sent a text to my friend saying, "Let's meet at the bar," and auto-correct changed it to "Let's meat at the bar." Now, I'm just hoping he doesn't show up with a butcher knife and a grill!
You know, I was scrolling through Twitter the other day, and I realized that social media is like the Wild West of communication. I mean, it's a place where people can say whatever they want without any consequences. I saw this tweet that said, "I just ate a whole pizza by myself, #NoRegrets." And I'm thinking, "Really? No regrets? Maybe your toilet has some regrets, but okay!
What's the deal with hashtags? I mean, people use them for everything nowadays. I saw a post that said, "Just had the best cup of coffee #CoffeeLover #CaffeineAddict #MorningFuel #LifeBlood #JavaJunkie." I'm waiting for the day when someone uses so many hashtags that their status update just collapses under the weight of all those pound signs. It's like a social media black hole!
We all have that one friend who insists on starting a group chat for every little thing. I have a group chat for work, for my family, for my high school buddies – it's like a support group for people who can't function without constant validation. And don't even get me started on the "read" receipts. Now, I know who's ignoring me in real-time! It's like a digital slap in the face.

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