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Observational Jokes

Updated on: Aug 19 2024

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You ever notice how turning off the lights in your own house turns you into a secret agent? I mean, one minute you're in the living room, next minute you're avoiding furniture like it's a laser security system. Mission: Don't wake up the cat.
Have you ever been in an elevator with strangers, and for some reason, everyone becomes an expert on the ceiling tiles? It's like a whole new world up there. We're all standing there, analyzing like we're art critics for architecture we know nothing about.
You know you're an adult when your idea of a wild Friday night is rearranging your furniture. It's like, "Yeah, I'm gonna move this couch from this side of the room to the other side... because I can." Call me the Feng Shui ninja.
Why is it that the minute you decide to take a nap, the entire neighborhood starts a lawnmower symphony? It's like they have a secret society dedicated to disrupting your midday siesta. I'm just trying to dream here, people!
Why is it that the snooze button on the alarm clock is the size of a small country, but the off button is microscopic? I'm half-asleep, fumbling around like I'm trying to defuse a bomb, just to make the noise stop.
There's a special kind of courage it takes to sneeze in a quiet restroom. You're in there, trying to time it with the hand dryer or a flush, like you're participating in some weird bathroom symphony. And if you mistime it? Well, you become the involuntary star of the show.
You ever notice how grocery carts have a mind of their own? You're strolling through the aisles, and suddenly your cart wants to make a left turn into the pasta section. It's like, "No, cart, we're on a mission for milk, stay focused!
Why do we press harder on the remote control when we know the batteries are weak? It's like, "Come on, just a little more pressure, and maybe it'll magically work better." Spoiler alert: It doesn't.
Why is it that the moment you decide to clean your car, it starts raining? I swear, Mother Nature is out there, holding a hose, waiting for you to break out the sponge. It's like she's the ultimate car wash troll.
The most suspenseful moment in any shower is when you drop the soap, and for a split second, you're a contortionist trying to catch it with your foot. It's a slippery game of reflexes, folks. Olympic-level shower gymnastics.

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