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I thought about getting a trampoline to bounce back into shape, but at this rate, I'd probably just sink into it like a sad, deflated marshmallow. Ah, the joys of defying gravity one sag at a time!
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I tried to embrace the "saggy chic" look, but I think my curtains got the memo instead. Every morning, they're just there, waving at me like, "Hey, we're going for that relaxed, draped look too!
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I went to a yoga class thinking it would help with the saggy bits. Instead, I felt like I was in a room full of deflated pool floats, all of us trying to find our inner buoyancy.
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My car's suspension has gotten so saggy, I swear it's trying to have a conversation with speed bumps. It's like, "Hey, buddy, remember when we used to glide over you? Those were the days.
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You know, they say as you age, things start to sag. I didn't realize they meant my memory foam mattress! I wake up, and it's like a cozy crater.
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You ever look at your favorite old sweater and think, "Wow, this used to hug me like a warm embrace," but now it's just hanging on for dear life, like it's auditioning for a role in a haunted house?
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There's something about the law of gravity and aging that makes it feel like I'm constantly in a gentle tug of war with myself. One day, I'm standing tall; the next, I'm contemplating investing in suspenders for my face.
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Ever notice how the more you try to keep things lifted and tightened, the more they seem to have a mind of their own? It's like trying to negotiate with a stubborn balloon that's lost its helium.
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You know you're getting older when your skin starts playing hide and seek. One day, it's up where it should be, the next, it's hanging out somewhere around your ankles, trying to make a break for it.
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