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You know, J.K. Rowling created a character who could turn into a cat, and I can't even turn my laundry into folded clothes. I think I need a wizarding intervention.
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J.K. Rowling created a sport on flying broomsticks, and the closest we have is trying not to fall while walking and texting. It's like a real-life game of Quidditch, but with more embarrassing moments.
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You ever notice how J.K. Rowling created a magical world where owls deliver mail, but in our world, the closest thing we have is our mail carriers getting chased by angry dogs? I don't remember Harry Potter dealing with that kind of Quidditch match!
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J.K. Rowling must have a magic quill or something because she managed to write seven books while I struggle to compose a coherent text message without autocorrect making me sound like a wizard with a speech impediment.
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J.K. Rowling made it seem like magic wands were essential, but in reality, the closest thing we have is a TV remote. Except, instead of saying "Expelliarmus," we shout, "Where's the darn remote?!
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You ever notice how J.K. Rowling wrote about time-turners, and I'm here desperately wishing I could turn back time just to avoid awkward conversations I had five minutes ago? Time-turner, where you at when I need you?
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You ever notice how J.K. Rowling made it seem like a magical mirror could reveal your deepest desires? In our world, we just have dressing room mirrors that make us question if we should have that second slice of cake. Mirror, mirror on the wall, why you gotta be so honest?
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J.K. Rowling wrote about a hidden platform at King's Cross Station that leads to Hogwarts. Meanwhile, I'm still trying to find the hidden platform in the grocery store where they restock the good snacks. Accio, Doritos!
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J.K. Rowling's characters had the Marauder's Map to track everyone's location. In our world, we have social media for that. Except, instead of saying, "I solemnly swear I am up to no good," we just scroll through our ex's Instagram.
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