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Resigning from Adulting
The challenges of resigning from adulting
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I'm seriously considering putting in my two weeks' notice for adulting. Can I just go back to the days when my biggest concern was whether the school cafeteria was serving pizza or mystery meat? I had simpler problems back then, like how to avoid vegetables.
Quitting Social Media Addiction
The struggle of quitting social media addiction
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I thought I'd quit social media for good, but now I find myself in awkward social situations, desperately trying to "like" people's conversations. Spoiler alert: It doesn't work. You just look like a weirdo.
Leaving a Gym Membership
The hilarity of quitting a gym membership
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I thought about quitting the gym, but then I remembered I need somewhere to go when I want to feel guilty about not working out. It's my guilt-trip destination. They should call it the "Shame Center" instead.
Giving Up on Diets
The challenges of giving up on diets
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I tried quitting carbs once, and within a week, my body staged a protest. I think my stomach picketed my brain, demanding the return of its beloved pasta. I caved; I'm weak, and carbs are persuasive.
Stopping Procrastination
The eternal struggle of stopping procrastination
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I decided to stop procrastinating, so I Googled "how to stop procrastinating." I got lost in a sea of motivational quotes and cat videos. Now, I have a new goal: becoming a professional cat video critic. It's a tough job, but someone has to do it.
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