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I tried running a quarter mile once, but then I realized it's much easier to just buy a car.
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I told my computer it could run a quarter mile in just a few seconds. It replied, 'That's nothing, watch me boot up!
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I told my friend I could run a quarter mile in 30 seconds. He said, 'That's impossible!' I replied, 'Well, I didn't say it would be in this century.
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Why do race car drivers make terrible comedians? Because their jokes always go too fast for the audience!
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