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I'm so dark, I think I’ve set a new record for my TV watching. I’ve reached the level where the screen asks, “Are you still there?” and the shadows are like, “Yeah, he's here, but barely.”
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I'm so dark that I have to put sunscreen on when I use my laptop outdoors during a solar eclipse.
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Ever notice how dark my sense of humor is? I went to a party and someone asked me to lighten up, so I told them I'd consider it when the sun decides to come back during winter.
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I’m so dark that when I walk into a room, people mistake me for a black hole sucking in all the light and laughter.
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I’ve realized I’m so dark that my phone's brightness automatically lowers when I unlock it, just to match my vibe.
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I’m the kind of dark that makes even my shadow ask, “Do you mind giving me some space?”
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You know you're a night owl when you turn off the lights in your house and the darkness goes, "Thank you, boss. I'll take it from here.
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I realized I’m pretty dark when I wear sunglasses at night not to protect my eyes, but to make sure the night doesn’t feel too bright.
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I’m so dark that at the beach, instead of getting a tan, I give the sun a run for its money. People ask if I’m trying to absorb the sunlight, and I’m like, "No, I just prefer to radiate darkness.
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