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Meeting Escape Artist
Trying to escape endless meetings without looking like you're escaping
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Meetings are the only place where you can say absolutely nothing, and everyone will still nod and pretend you made a profound point. It's like a support group for people who are really good at saying nothing.
Deadline Daredevil
The adrenaline rush of procrastination and the fear of missing deadlines
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My best work is always done under pressure. If I don't feel the impending doom of a looming deadline, is it really my best work? I'm not sure, but it's definitely my most caffeinated work.
Coffee Break Philosopher
The constant struggle between needing caffeine and avoiding too many bathroom breaks
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I don't take smoke breaks; I take coffee breaks. It's not that I need the caffeine; I just want to practice my "looking pensive while stirring my coffee" technique.
Email Survivor
Navigating the treacherous waters of a flooded inbox
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There are two types of people: those who have a clean inbox and those who know how to hide the fact that they're drowning in a sea of unread messages. I belong to the second group.
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