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I asked the blacksmith if he could make me a bicycle. He said he could, but it would be a two-tire-ing job.
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Why did the blacksmith always carry a pencil? Because he wanted to draw iron!
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What did one anvil say to the other? You're looking a bit hammered today!
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Why did the blacksmith become a musician? He wanted to make some heavy metal!
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The Smiths – not just a band, but also the mysterious reason your toaster keeps disappearing. I bet Morrissey is in my kitchen, writing a depressing song about my missing Pop-Tarts.
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I bought a 'The Smiths' t-shirt, and now every time I wear it, people assume I'm a deep, introspective soul. Little do they know, the only thing I'm contemplating is whether to order pizza or Chinese for dinner.
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I asked my friend why he named his pet hamster after 'The Smiths.' He said, 'Because it only runs on the wheel when it's feeling miserable.' Now, I'm wondering if my cat should be called 'The Cure.'
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You know you're getting old when 'The Smiths' goes from being a cool band to just the average attendance at your family reunion. 'Hey, Aunt Mildred, did you bring the potato salad? And where's Johnny? Oh, he's with The Smiths.'
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I joined 'The Smiths' support group for people who can't stop singing 'Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want' at inappropriate times. The first rule of the support group is... well, we don't talk about it, we just hum quietly to ourselves.
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Dating someone from 'The Smiths' fan club is like playing Minesweeper blindfolded. You never know when you'll step on a lyric that triggers an emotional explosion. 'Oh, you don't like 'There Is A Light That Never Goes Out'? This relationship is over.'
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My therapist asked me to describe my emotional state using a 'The Smiths' song title. I told her it's a mix of 'Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now' and 'This Charming Man.' She just sighed and asked if I wanted to double my sessions.
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I tried starting a band called 'The Browns' to compete with 'The Smiths.' Turns out, people are more interested in music than the color of their underwear. Who knew?
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I went to a 'The Smiths' tribute concert, and it was so authentic that halfway through, the lead singer stopped performing and just stood there looking sad. It was like, 'Wow, you really captured the essence of Morrissey's stage presence.'
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