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Lost in Translation at the Southwest Airport
Navigating the linguistic labyrinth
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Southwest Airlines has a boarding group called "A-List." I thought it was an exclusive club or something. So, I confidently walked up to the counter and said, "I'm here for the A-List." The lady looked at me and said, "Sweetie, this is Southwest, not Hollywood. Take a seat.
The Battle of the Armrests in Southwest Flights
Armrest Armageddon
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I had a strategy for the armrest war on Southwest: I'd casually let my arm drift onto it, hoping the other person wouldn't notice. But the guy next to me was a pro. He countered with a textbook move and claimed the armrest like it was the last piece of pizza. Well played, sir. Well played.
Lost Luggage Adventures in the Southwest
The Mysterious Case of the Vanishing Suitcase
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Southwest Airlines has this tracking system for lost luggage. They told me my suitcase was in Albuquerque. I'm like, "Great, now my suitcase is having a better vacation than I am. I bet it's sipping a margarita by the pool while I'm stuck at the airport.
Southwest Snack Scuffles
The Battle for the Last Bag of Pretzels
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Southwest offers complimentary snacks, but by the time they get to your row, it's slim pickings. I asked the flight attendant, "Do you have any more snacks?" She handed me an empty bag and said, "You can pretend." Thanks, Southwest, I'll savor the imaginary flavor.
Southwest Seating Strategy
The Battle for the Perfect Seat
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The flight attendant announced, "You're free to choose any available seat!" It's like musical chairs but with more luggage and less music. I saw a grandma sprinting past me; she was determined to sit in the emergency exit row. Grandma, I respect your commitment to legroom.
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