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Why did the snitch open a bakery? Because they wanted to make dough without stitches!
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I told my friend about the snitch who started a gardening business. Now he's planting stitches everywhere!
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What's a snitch's favorite type of dessert? Tattle-tiramisu with extra stitches on top!
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What's a snitch's favorite type of clothing? Stitches and snitch-knit sweaters!
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Why did the snitch become a tailor? They were really good at sewing stories together – and stitches, of course!
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Why did the snitch start a band? They wanted to make music that really resonates with stitches!
Snitches get Stitches
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I joined a cooking class to impress my friends with my culinary skills. But one day, I accidentally revealed the secret ingredient to my signature dish to the chef. Big mistake. Suddenly, I found myself blindfolded and taken to a secret kitchen in the back. The chef leaned in and whispered, Snitches get stitches. Turns out, my secret ingredient was so secret, even I didn't know what it was.
Snitches get Stitches
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I tried to impress my date by taking her to a fancy restaurant. When the bill came, I jokingly suggested we split it. She looked at me dead serious and said, Snitches get stitches. Apparently, splitting the bill is a first-class ticket to the friendzone. Now I'm stuck in the culinary no man's land, where romance goes to die.
Snitches get Stitches
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I tried to organize a surprise party for my friend, but someone spilled the beans. I gathered everyone and said, We have a snitch among us. The room fell silent until my friend's grandma pointed at the cake and said, Well, I didn't want stitches, dear. I've got arthritis! I guess not all snitches are undercover agents; some just want to avoid medical bills.
Snitches get Stitches
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I tried to teach my dog a new trick – the classic roll over. I was so proud when he finally got it. But then my neighbor's cat saw it and reported my dog to the feline authorities for collusion with the enemy. Now my dog has to wear a little sign that says, Snitches get stitches. I swear, neighborhood animals are like the KGB of the suburbs.
Snitches get Stitches
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I decided to start a book club with my buddies. Everything was going well until one of them reported me for dog-earing the pages. Next thing I know, I'm in a dimly lit room, facing a jury of avid readers. The judge looked at me sternly and declared, Snitches get stitches. Now I'm banned from the book club, and my only crime was a little literary vandalism.
Snitches get Stitches
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I told my grandma I was thinking of joining a reality show. She looked at me and said, Remember, snitches get stitches. I didn't know Survivor had a sewing circle in between the challenges. Now I have to choose between alliances and a good tailor. Tough decisions, man.
Snitches get Stitches
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I overheard my coworkers talking about the office coffee thief. So, I decided to be a hero and report it to HR. They called me into the office, handed me a sewing kit, and said, Snitches get stitches. Now I'm on coffee duty, stitching together the torn fabric of office unity, one stitch at a time.
Snitches get Stitches
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I thought I could trust my GPS to keep our road trip plans a secret. But every time I entered a destination, it gave me this warning, Snitches get stitches. Now I have trust issues with my own technology. I guess even Siri is part of the underground snitch network, keeping tabs on your travel secrets.
Snitches get Stitches
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I recently moved to a new neighborhood, and they have this neighborhood watch committee. I thought it was all about keeping the community safe until I overheard them talking about my lawn being too long. So, I reported myself to the committee for a little experiment. Next thing I know, I'm standing in front of my house, and the neighborhood watch guy hands me a needle and thread. Snitches get stitches, he says. I guess my grass needed some stitches.
Snitches get Stitches
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You ever hear that saying, snitches get stitches? Yeah, apparently, it's the street code for staying quiet. I tried applying it to my group of friends. I told them my New Year's resolution was to be a better person. They looked at me and said, Dude, snitches get stitches. I was just trying to be a good guy, not infiltrate the mafia! Now I'm stuck with a resolution to be a mediocre person.
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