5 Jokes For Snitches Get Stitches

Double Meaning Jokes

Updated on: Aug 01 2025

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The Tech Support Snitch

Colleagues think I'm the one reporting their unauthorized software installations.
I overheard two coworkers whispering, "Watch out, the IT snitch is nearby." I leaned in and said, "If you're talking about me, I prefer the term 'Software Surveillance Specialist.' It has a nice ring to it, don't you think?

The Pet Detective

My dog thinks I'm ratting him out to the vet.
I caught my dog watching Animal Planet, and whenever they showed a vet on TV, he barked like crazy. I guess he's trying to drown out the sound of me confessing his dietary secrets to the professionals.

The Office Snitch

I've been labeled the office snitch, and now everyone is on edge.
The office tension is so high; I overheard someone say, "Loose lips sink ships, and apparently, a loose stapler can get you fired. Watch your office supplies, folks!

The Family Ties

My family thinks I'm the one snitching on our secrets.
My family's paranoia is off the charts. They even created a family crest with the motto "Snitches get disinvited to Thanksgiving." Looks like I'll be spending that day with my microwave dinner.

The Neighbor

My neighbor thinks I'm the neighborhood snitch.
My neighbor is convinced I'm a snitch, so now every time I see him, I pretend to talk into an invisible microphone and say, "Suspect spotted in Sector 7, requesting backup in the form of sugar. Over.

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