17 Jokes For Sjw

Puns

Updated on: Aug 19 2024

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How does an SJW describe a rainbow? As a diverse spectrum of colors!
How does an SJW write an email? With a subject line that's politically correct!
What's an SJW's favorite kind of music? Social Just-tunes!
What do you call an SJW who's also a magician? An activist prestidigitator!
What's an SJW's favorite snack? Activist almonds - they're nuts about social justice!
What's an SJW's favorite exercise? Jumping to conclusions!
What's an SJW's favorite game? The equality of life!

Social Justice Warriors – My Unlikely Superheroes

You know, I recently discovered that SJWs are like my own personal superheroes. Yeah, they swoop in with their capes made of recycled materials and fight for justice on Twitter. I mean, who needs Batman when you've got someone ready to cancel injustice with a strongly worded tweet?

SJW Parenting Tips

SJW parenting must be a wild ride. Instead of the traditional birds and bees talk, they probably have a seminar on unicorns and rainbows. And when their kid asks, Where do babies come from? they respond with, From a place of pure, intersectional love, my dear.

SJW Dictionary

I heard SJWs are working on a new dictionary. It's a revolutionary concept – instead of words having definitions, they have feelings. Imagine a world where dictionaries come with trigger warnings. Warning: The following words may cause discomfort, use with caution. I can't wait for the day we have emotional Thesauruses!

SJW Dating Advice

I asked an SJW for dating advice, and they told me, Just be yourself, but also be someone completely different to cater to everyone's preferences. So now, my dating profile reads, I'm a confident introverted-extrovert who's vegan on Mondays, carnivorous on Wednesdays, and a shape-shifting lizard person on Fridays. Swipe right if you believe in true identity fluidity!

SJW Time Travel

If SJWs had a time machine, they'd probably go back to rewrite history. In this revised edition, everyone gets a participation trophy, and dinosaurs were actually vegetarian poets who loved hugging. I can't wait for the day they fix my embarrassing high school moments.

SJW Superpowers

SJWs have a unique superpower – the ability to detect microaggressions from a mile away. I tried to sneak one past them once, but they caught it and gave me a disapproving look that could melt steel. I guess the real heroes wear cardigans.

SJW Tech Support

I called SJW tech support because my laptop was acting up. Instead of fixing the issue, they lectured me on how technology perpetuates the patriarchy. Now my laptop identifies as a tablet, and I have to respect its life choices.

SJW Support Groups

I heard there's an SJW support group. The first rule is: you do not assume anyone's pronouns. The second rule is: YOU DO NOT ASSUME ANYONE'S PRONOUNS! It's like Fight Club, but with more sensitivity training.

SJW Standup

I thought about doing an SJW-friendly standup comedy special. But then I realized every joke would have to come with a trigger warning, and the only punchline allowed would be a group hug. So, here I am, sticking to regular comedy – where the only trigger is uncontrollable laughter.

SJW Fitness Challenge

I tried joining this new fitness craze – it's called the SJW Workout. Basically, you just jump to conclusions and run from responsibility. It's the only workout where you burn calories while avoiding any real-world consequences. Who needs a gym membership when you can just outrun accountability?

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