17 Jokes For Second Cousin

Puns

Updated on: Mar 06 2025

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I asked my second cousin if they believed in aliens. They said, 'No, but I believe in extraterrestrial second cousins!
Why did the second cousin start a gardening club? They wanted to sow some seeds of family unity!
Why did the second cousin become a chef? Because they knew how to stir up the family pot!
My second cousin and I decided to start a business together. We're going to open a 'Cousin Counseling' service – because family matters!
Why did the second cousin start a band? They wanted to create some 'harmony' in the family tree!
Why did the second cousin go to therapy? They needed someone to help them deal with all the 'distant' family issues!
Why did the second cousin bring a ladder to the family reunion? Because they heard it was a step-cousin event!
I found out my second cousin is a genealogy enthusiast. He traced our family tree back centuries. I told him, 'That's impressive, but can you find out why Aunt Linda always brings fruitcake to family gatherings?'
Having a second cousin is like having a secret agent in the family. They show up out of nowhere, drop a bombshell about shared ancestry, and then disappear until the next family reunion. 'Cousin, Classified.'
Having a second cousin is like having a backup friend – someone you can call when your first choice is busy. 'Hey, can you grab a coffee? My best friend is binge-watching cat videos.'
My second cousin tried to set me up on a blind date with another distant relative. I said, 'Are you trying to matchmake or just save on family reunion invitations?'
I discovered I have a second cousin who's a stand-up comedian too. It's like a genetic comedy club. We may not have the same material, but at least we share the same awkward family stories. It's a two-drink minimum for emotional survival.
Second cousins are like the middle children of the family tree. Not close enough to borrow money from, but close enough to accidentally swipe the last piece of Aunt Edna's famous meatloaf at Thanksgiving.
I asked my second cousin how we were related, and he said, 'Oh, we're practically siblings.' I don't remember signing up for that level of commitment. I can barely commit to a Netflix series.
I recently discovered I have a second cousin. Turns out, we share 3.2% DNA. I thought, 'Great, now I have someone to blame for my irrational fear of garden gnomes.'
My second cousin invited me to his wedding. I thought, 'Great, free cake!' But then I realized I had to make small talk with relatives I barely know. That's when I discovered the true cost of wedding cake: socializing.
Second cousins, you know? It's like playing genetic roulette. Will we get the family nose or the elusive talent for interpretative dance? It's a wild ride at the family reunion!

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