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The Confused Second Cousin
Trying to figure out how you're related without sounding ignorant
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Being a second cousin is like being in the middle of nowhere on Google Maps. You're technically there, but nobody really knows how to get to you.
The Overly Enthusiastic Second Cousin
Taking family bonding to a whole new level
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You know your second cousin is too into family when they have a tattoo that says "Blood is Thicker than Water." I suggested they add, "But not as thick as molasses, which is what binds us during awkward family dinners.
The Mysterious Second Cousin
Keeping family secrets while pretending to know nothing
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My second cousin claims to have insider information on family scandals. I asked, "Who cheated at Monopoly during the last reunion?" They replied, "I could tell you, but then I'd have to disown you." Monopoly is serious business, apparently.
The Competitive Second Cousin
Turning family events into a competition
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Family barbecues with my second cousin are like a culinary battle. They're like, "I smoked the ribs for 12 hours." I'm over here like, "I microwaved the potato salad. Who's the real MVP?
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