4 Jokes About Printers

Standup-Comedy Bits

Updated on: Jul 06 2025

cancel
Rating
Sort By:
You ever notice how printers in the office are like these silent ninjas? They wait until you're in the middle of a crucial document, feeling all confident, and then BAM! They strike. It's like they have a sixth sense for when you're most vulnerable. You click "print," and suddenly it's the slowest, most deliberate process in the world. I swear, it's printing each page like it's the Magna Carta or something.
And don't get me started on the noise. Printers have this unique talent for being the loudest thing in the room, but only when you desperately need silence. It's like they have a secret meeting every night and plan to have a jam session right when you're on that important conference call. It's always, "Oh, you need to focus? Let me just hum, grind, and screech for the next 10 minutes.
Printer ink is like the elixir of life, but way more expensive. I swear, it's like buying a small vial of unicorn tears. And don't even get me started on the colors. Cyan, magenta, yellow—sounds like a weird game of Clue. "It was Professor Plum in the office with the cyan ink cartridge!"
And when the printer tells you it's low on ink, it's not a gentle reminder; it's a demand for a sacrifice. "Replace black ink cartridge." It's like the printer is the high priest of the ink cult, demanding you bring forth a virgin cartridge to appease the printing gods. I half-expect it to start chanting, "Inkus Printicus!" as I fumble with the replacement.
Why do printers act like they're on a quest for the Holy Grail when it comes to connecting to Wi-Fi? You'd think you're asking them to solve a Rubik's Cube blindfolded. "Searching for network..." they say, as if they're explorers in uncharted territory. It's 2023, and my printer is still trying to figure out this whole wireless thing. I've seen faster dial-up connections.
And then there's the moment of truth: when you finally manage to connect, and the printer triumphantly declares, "Connected to network." It's like it just discovered fire or split the atom. I want to throw a little celebration every time, like, "Congratulations, printer! You did it! Now, how about printing that document I need?
I've started to believe that printer error messages are written by some ancient civilization that used hieroglyphics. I mean, what is a "paper jam in tray 3" supposed to mean? Tray 3 doesn't even exist! And when the printer tells me it's low on toner, it's like it's confessing to a crime. "Warning: Low on toner. Please replace cartridge." It might as well say, "We're running out of ink, and it's your fault. You should've seen it coming."
And then there's the classic "printer offline" message. It's like the printer is playing hard to get. "Oh, you need to print that important report? Sorry, I'm not in the mood. Try again later." I half-expect it to respond with, "It's not you; it's me.

Post a Comment


How was your experience?
0 0 reviews
5 Stars
(0)
4 Stars
(0)
3 Stars
(0)
2 Stars
(0)
1 Stars
(0)

Topic of the day

Go-somewhere
Jul 07 2025

0
Total Topics
0
Added Today